Portal opening

Ramblings about life . . .

What I share about my life is simply to help reinforce the understanding that it is possible to live with love and laughter, in between the tough times.

Life is what we make of it, no matter how harrowing. We accept and embody this with-in ourselves, thereby allowing the energy to manifest outwardly in our reality.

It starts with each one of us as an individual to form the collective consciousness.

Be the dream.

We honour the light and the life within you.

Please be aware - I upload other bloggers' posts and then delete after a month. This is my journey and others help me understand where I am, until they become irrelevant (a few posts excepted).

Saturday, 31 December 2011


Hubby is going through his own ‘dark night of the soul’ at the moment.

It has been building for a while…he’s been looking and acting stranger and stranger each day. He’s been seeing and feeling things that were puzzling me. An example is yesterday…he started to rant about money and how we never have enough. Huh? Huh?

Thursday, 29 December 2011

Another year

And so we head for the end of another year.

The year that was…very interesting and extremely intense. I’m not sure I recognise myself, I have changed so much, as has everyone around me.

Once again I face change. We are in the process of moving the sleep unit back up to the hospital. Yesterday was a day of moving and unpacking. Oh gawd, back ache and sore feet. Compared to the house that we were in, this ward is HUGE and we kept getting lost. The excitement and squeals of delight as we discovered we had so much space J

Off up to the hospital again today to finalise a few bits and bobs and then tomorrow – business as usual…well sort of…our official day opening is on Tuesday, 3 Jan.

Met my son’s new boss too. Lovely lady.

Once Christmas, the move and New Year are over I can concentrate on our trip to Oz to see our daughter.

Wednesday, 28 December 2011



Hubby and I have had a slight bust up and have retreated to our respective caves for a while.

Relationships between couples can be quite intense at times and it is not for the fainthearted at all.

We are both quite passionate…okay let’s qualify that. We are passionate in our own ways. Hubby is a very overprotective, act-first-think-later, sacrifice all for everyone to his own detriment kinda man. Whereas I am a thinker, contemplative, listen and look at both sides first before acting. But…and this is a big but we do interchange these positions quite a bit lately. Not so in the beginning of our relationship. He is passionate with his emotions, I am passionate about my journey.

Sunday, 25 December 2011

Amorah Quan Yin: Sacred Sex and the Awakening of Your Soul

This is an extract from Amorah Quan Yin's website http://www.amorahquanyin.com/a_sacredsex.html
which ties in with what I have been experiencing lately.

We have for a long while tried to intellectualise tantra and believed that by following the rituals we would achieve the blissful state we want. She is quite correct in her statement 'Some of those who practice tantra today have forgotten the major keys for this aspect of awakening which are surrender, love, and sacredness. There are those who practice tantra who have omitted these ingredients while doing all the techniques accurately. The end result will eventually be the attainment of power that is devoid of surrender to love and sacredness. And I believe we have enough history behind us to understand the dangers implicit in such attainment.'

Without the surrender during love making we are not in a state of true bliss. We tend to live more in our mind than find a unifying blend of mind body and spirit not only within ourselves but with our partner.

I find this is true with processing as well. Many try and process their emotions with their mind, instead of surrendering to the feeling and experiencing the emotions fully and allowing that which has been suppressed to rise to the surface and be acknowledged. Saying goodbye to an emotion that has been with you and served you can be scary as certain patterns define us.

Strip away everything from someone and see what is underneath. Left naked and vulnerable can be quite daunting.

Anyways...enough from me and my rambling.

Here is the extract that explains it far better than I could:

Saturday, 24 December 2011

Our universe

I’ve always known each one of us is our own universe…kinda like a universe within a universe within a universe, etc.

I’d known it but it had been an intellectual knowledge rather than an understanding that both my mind and body understood. Once the body understands, it becomes part of us and our whole perspective changes. It’s almost as though a door is opened and we step through and become what we were standing on the outside looking in through the window at.

Thursday, 22 December 2011

Portal to Love and Pleasure

I have taken time out from the transmutation work over the solstice and Christmas week.

Last night I entered a dreamscape that was both a dream and very real at the same time. I was aware of being somewhere else and yet aware of being in bed. Hubby’s HS was very strongly present over and in his body. I was struck by how big he was physically, as I lay with my head on his shoulder. And yet I could feel him beneath this overlay.

We were communicating telepathically and it felt so natural and very normal. Caught between my real self and this expanded version of me was very strange but I didn’t question, simply accepted it. As I write now I am having difficulty putting everything into sequence and explaining it in words.

Wednesday, 21 December 2011


Happy solstice to all.

Thrive - What on earth will it take?

A friend sent me this video this morning. I have not watched all of it.

Tube Torus and other sacred geometries that most of us know about...but the visuals are quite spectacular.

Dismantling of a matrix

I would like to thank everyone for their support and love on the blog Deep Dark Matrix. I really appreciate and am very grateful to every one of you.

I have spent many a year clearing any of my own sexual issues from any past lives where I have either been the abuser or the abused. This lifetime I have not experienced any of that. My only foray into that kinda thing has been using sex as a weapon of power in all my experiences with lovers. Love ‘em and leave ‘em was my motto. I couldn’t be bothered with feelings or relationships and loved the idea of being in control. Once that was out of my system, I met hubby.

Tuesday, 20 December 2011

Merry Christmas

May you all be blessed with a wonderful and cheerful Christmas filled with love and laughter wherever you are and whatever you're doing.

Here's a singing card to make you smile.

Hugs and love

Monday, 19 December 2011

Deep dark matrix

Am I a sucker for punishment or what?

Here I am once again transmuting for the collective…and it is very dark here, very dark. This 3D sexual matrix is enough to drive anyone insane. But I suppose I wouldn’t be doing it if I wasn’t strong enough to handle it.

My life as such is great – no dramas or dilemmas and so if I hadn’t had information about where I am energetically and what I’m experiencing, I’d a thought I had regressed into a nightmare somehow.

Saturday, 17 December 2011

Working together

How bizarre…my son has, this week, landed a job up at the hospital. In all envisioned scenarios for him, working in a hospital environ was not one of them. His gatekeeper mentioned this would happen but I didn’t necessarily believe it. Well…okay, I always take everything with a great pinch of salt.

Anyways, after chatting to his gatekeeper it seems it was destined and being held off until the time was right. It seems that we both need to hold the balance there as some huge break through is going to be made. The Queen Victoria Hospital has always been a ground-breaking hospital.

Friday, 16 December 2011

Temper temper

My two kitties are lying in their favourite spot…on top of hubby’s cupboard. After breakfast and an intense session of deep cleaning, they normally sleep with their arms wrapped around each other. When they wake the ritual is to take turns to clean each other as a greeting. All very sweet and loving until-

She suddenly rears back with her ears flat, tail flicking, while he watches her, ears forward almost smiling. She gets herself into a frenzy hissing at him while he nonchalantly lies watching her. His lack of reaction always makes her really angry and she climbs into him. He is a large laid-back black cat, a gentle giant, while she is a smaller tabby, feisty and fearless. All it takes to end it is for him to stand and give her one loud resounding smack on the head. She flicks her tail and stalks off in a huff, while he goes back to sleep.

Tuesday, 13 December 2011

Duty of care

Full moon this weekend taken from our back garden

Saturday morning I woke with the words ‘duty of care’ buzzing around in my head. I had a vague recollection of a night of dreams around this.

Monday, 12 December 2011

Oh look, a toadstool village

A few weeks ago we went for a walk through the countryside. It was a gorgeous 'spring' day and we came across a village of toadstools.


Brand new day

A Brand New Day…this song by Sting came on as I started to write this piece…and then David Bowie’s Ashes to Ashes.

It’s been a very hard but interesting week. My mind kept buzzing with the words ‘sexual matrix’. Couldn’t quite figure out what was going on, but then again I wasn’t in a space to do so.

Saturday, 10 December 2011

Jim Self: 2012 - What do you mean the 3rd dimension is going away?

Channel from Jim Self

I've never followed Jim Self but came across this on LW and decided to upload.

Monday, 5 December, 2011

As 2012 approaches there is an increasing urgency to this message because we’re all, literally, running out of time to play in the third dimension.

In simple terms, the habit of thinking and feeling and behaving that we know of as the third dimension is going away. Everyone is shifting into a fourth dimensional consciousness and experience, and then into a fifth dimensional consciousness and experience.

However, most people on the planet are not prepared for this Shift. But it is happening nonetheless, and for those who are unaware of what’s going on it will not be an easy or comfortable experience.

Yet this can be a wonderful, enjoyable time as well. With some basic information about what the Shift is, and what “dimensions” are, and with simple tools to help manage our thoughts and feelings, everyone has the ability to evolve their consciousness and move gracefully and joyfully into these higher vibrational realms.

Friday, 9 December 2011

Not fitting

I would love to say that these last four days have been fabulous in my 5D reality, but the truth is that it has been a bit like wearing a hessian bag…itchy and makes me irritable.

In South Africa we have winds called Berg winds – or in English ‘mountain’ winds which blow hot and heavy and make you feel irritable. I feel like that – like I am being contained within something and have expanded so much that I feel irritable within the confines of my skin. One minute hot and sweaty and then cold -swinging from one to another with no sight of balance at all.

Tuesday, 6 December 2011

Wouldn't it be nice

The Beach Boys’ song Wouldn’t It Be Nice has been winging its way through my mind today.

I finally had a look at it on YouTube…hehe…yeah I understand why now.

Ahh…the joys of ascension.

Sunday, 4 December 2011

Cocooned in my own world

This has been a time, for me, of being insular. Whatever is out there in channelled or other information has seemed either irrelevant to me or old.

I’ve wanted to be cocooned in my own world and flow wherever it took me without any interference from outside. I still feel this way. So this is going to be a brief blog.

Tuesday, 29 November 2011


The expectations I place upon myself are ridiculous. I discover something new and then expect to be able to understand and ‘do it’ within a few hours or days…and then get myself tied up in knots when I cannot.

I realised that this had become an issue for me over the last few days…always expecting more. I woke this morning and thought, ‘I’m taking a break.’

Yep, a break from figuring this out…I’m going to simply let it all sink in slowly and allow what I know to become me.

Stepping back and stop acting like a mad scientist :)

Aeolus - Acoustic Wind Pavilion

Haha...I found this a few days ago. Wouldn't I love to have this in my back yard...


Aeolus - Acoustic Wind Pavilion

Aeolus - ruler of the four winds in Greek mythology.

>>>>Extended dates NOW Open at MediaCityUK, Salford until 4th December<<<<

Aeolus is a giant stringed musical instrument, an acoustic and optical pavilion designed to make audible the silent shifting patterns of the wind and to visually amplify the ever changing sky.

Different timelines

I’d recently started to get a niggling suspicion that I might possibly have been inserted into different timelines here on Earth. I’ve always known that I stepped down into the third dimension through the Pleiades, but that doesn’t actually make me Pleiadian.

I like the sound of being an Arcturian but even though this sort of rings true, it doesn’t resonate completely. Maybe the Arcturians also helped, like the Pleiadians, to ready me for my lifetimes on Earth.

Monday, 28 November 2011

Not here

Grroooaannn…I had to kick start myself this morning. No energy, puffy eyed and exhausted. When does it stop?

This bleary eyed feeling started yesterday afternoon with a strong restless feeling that I wasn’t completely here. Hubby was extremely irritable. He went off to play football and came back after an hour saying he was fed up and didn’t want to play. The tension in the house is palpable.

Sunday, 27 November 2011

Consciously travelling

A while ago I asked when I would consciously be able to use my Merkaba to travel with my physical body.

The answer was short and sweet - when I have consciously moved my astral body without having to go into deep meditation, which is what I normally have to do.

Saturday, 26 November 2011

Family units

 Had a very interesting thing happen in the early hours of Thursday morning.

A group of men were fighting up and down our road. Normally when this happens I simply place them in a column of balance and send them healing and eventually they move on or the fight disintegrates.

Wednesday, 23 November 2011

Living multi-dimensionally


Today I’ve had a long meditation and ‘discussion’ with Aeolus. He has put my mind at ease. I was worrying that I was missing out on so much with the constant downloads.

This is the gist of what he said.

Tuesday, 22 November 2011

Surely it gets better

Why did I believe that the higher I vibrated, the better things would get?

Hmm…I suppose it is better. If I look back over the last year right back to the beginning of the year, I can see how much I have grown. I am almost…almost not the same person and I am quite sure that if my extended family in South Africa were to see me, they would hardly recognise the inner me. The last time we visited was in 2005 and much has happened since then.

Monday, 21 November 2011

Letting go and moving on

On Friday I had a bit of an enlightenment. Our son had decided he does not want to continue studying and would prefer to work. After a long and frank discussion we notified the school that he would not finish Sixth Form.

Thursday, 17 November 2011

Fine tuning the balancing act

A vivid dream about where I will be living in the not too distant future woke me this morning. I lay half asleep relishing the wonderful feeling it evoked. The peace and harmony I knew existed within the community and the sheer pleasure at knowing I was fulfilling my deepest desire.

Wednesday, 16 November 2011

Fractals Part 2

Yesterday, 14 November

Fractals grow, change and morph as needed, depending on our frequency.

Monday, 14 November 2011


Restlessness has been our constant companion. Both hubby and I feel like whatever we do is not quite right but we’re restless enough to keep trying to find what fits. Stepping out of the box…again. No handbook on what to do, but simply find what resonates with me.

Sunday, 13 November 2011


Gift from my hubby

Phwoar did 11.11.11 start with a bit of vooma.

I was woken rather pleasantly by an amorous husband and as I became aware of what was happening I found myself in my Merkaba speeding along the stars flashing past me.

Thursday, 10 November 2011


Fractals…a word that was running around in my head this morning when I woke. What on earth is a fractal? I’ve heard it before have never known what it is.

I decided to Google it and found out that fractals are the most beautiful of shapes – snowflakes for instance. When I saw some snowflakes, it reminded me of Dr Emoto’s work when he photographed the beautiful shapes that water crystals formed.

I learnt quite a bit of sacred geometry in 1996 such as the Fibonacci spiral and golden mean but never really paid much attention to it after that, although I did note the odd thing here and there. But I don’t remember the word fractal ever being used and now I discover the world is full of fractals – lightning, ferns, broccoli, peacock feathers, leaves, etc.

Wednesday, 9 November 2011

Angelic sirens

I had a very long meditation today and during this I decided to have a look at my left hip which has been giving me slight twinges lately of extreme pain which come and go. There’s no rhyme or reason to it.

Months ago I realised that my skeleton was becoming opal. Having a look at my left hip I could see that a portion of it had not grown fully into the change. It seems I am hanging on to the last bit because once that’s gone I have no excuse and will become fully an angelic crystalline human.

Sunday, 6 November 2011

Lighting up the world

Daily I am coming to realise how important it is for us to reflect back to those around us, their inner magnificence. It keeps getting shoved in my face to let me know how much of a difference it makes to others.

I’ve never been given the chance to actually ‘see’ the results of any impact that I’ve made until recently. Maybe I didn’t need to know as I was so engrossed in my own stuff, that having the burden of responsibility firmly lain upon my shoulders might have freaked me out completely.

Saturday, 5 November 2011

Jason McElway, Autistic Basketball Hero

A friend sent me this wonderful story of an autistic boy, whose passion is quite awe inspiring.

It is great to see such heartwarming and happy events in the news.

May our world soon be filled with similar miraculous events that become the norm.

Friday, 4 November 2011


I have been having quite a bit of fun this morning using intention.

Yesterday evening when I arrived home from work, my son informed me that he’d ‘borrowed’ the mouse from my laptop as his wasn’t working. Fine…I wasn’t planning on using it much last night anyway and I could always buy a new one today.

Monday, 31 October 2011

Well now, ain't that interesting

I have felt like I am in ‘holding’. I keep getting this word buzzing around in my head when I ask what is happening. For a few days I seemed to lose contact with all my helpers, until this morning. In reality I hadn’t lost contact with them – I was simply so engrossed in the new experience that I was focused on that.

Fond and not so fond memories

I recently did a search on Facebook to see if I could find out about my old high school in Windhoek, Namibia. I found a group started for all St Pauls College students – old and new and so I decided to join and have found a few old school ‘friends’.

Friday, 28 October 2011

Karma and fun

What a way to end the Ninth Wave of the Mayan calendar. I have to write an assignment on abuse. Erk. I’ve been putting it off but finally have to get my arse into gear as it needs to be in by this weekend. Maybe I was hoping the world would change over night and I wouldn’t have to J

So instead…I am writing a blog…hehe…any excuse, eh? Reminds me of school and college, always an excuse to do the least amount of work and have the most amount of fun  and boy...did I ever? J

Tuesday, 25 October 2011

What are dark entities?

I’m not keen on doing writing this but Athena has insisted. She says that lack of knowledge creates fear. If people are informed then the fear factor is taken away and people are empowered. As I have been doing transmutation and working to clear my own negative energies for years I figure I possibly have an insight into this and with Athena’s help we will clarify.

I am sure Ishtar and the other gatekeepers know most of this…

Monday, 24 October 2011


Well…what can I say…this has been a rather enlightening week for me.

Where to start?

I'd been skipping along on a high for a while after the angel activation/integration and then fell flat on my face. Sometimes it’s good to have this because it puts things into perspective, especially when you realise how far you’ve come – it’s a good bench mark.

Wednesday, 19 October 2011

Dark energy

I wrote an article about 8 years ago with regard to how our energy affects our children. I wrote it basically in response to a worried mother's query about her children's teeth on a forum that was an offshoot of the Lightworker.com (Steve Rother) website.

How you might wonder does that answer her question? Well, I had realised over the years that energetically I influence my children.

Monday, 17 October 2011

Disharmonic 4D

Hehe…ya think I’ve stirred up the energies?

Ever since I did my video blog Joy Joy and fire breath, I’ve attracted the attention of some strange guestbook entries on my website. Nothing awful – simply reams of random names.

Sunday, 16 October 2011

Detached observer

The detached observer is something I have practised over the years, but until recently never understood it…and, I do believe, didn’t really do the words ‘detached observer’ justice.

When we interact with others (no matter what dimension) we are interacting not only physically but on an energetic level and on many layers.

Saturday, 15 October 2011


Thursday, 13 October

What a beautiful and peaceful day I’ve had.  I was busy but it was a busy-ness that wasn’t overwhelming.

But…as I was walking to work I noticed that in amongst all this bliss was a smidgen of sadness.

Thursday, 13 October 2011

Pure JOY

Pure JOY. Complete and utter joy.
Last night I woke after another very deep sleep to find myself once again surrounded. This time Aeolus was in the forefront. Athena seems to have taken a back seat lately.
I still felt very floaty with the joy and love I’d experienced during the day and mentioned in my video blog Joy Joy and Fire Breath .
I did a fire breath or two and lay quietly waiting. 

Tuesday, 11 October 2011

Honoring Divine Masculine and the Divine 12D Blueprint from Source

Another really great read from Luminance River.


Source created the universe from three primordial sounds on the higher dimensions. This I hear as a story, and it resonates, like the sound OM as the beginning, which is a vibration and a frequency. From frequencies and vibrations worlds are created. 12D was created as a divine blueprint for life from source. I sense this is what Barbara Marciniak speaks of when she channels Pleaidians and mentions how important the living library is. It is the codes for the divine blueprint and we carry them in our DNA, and all life carries this blueprint, the original undistorted one. It is the crystal consciousness from BEFORE all the programming of culture was put onto humans. It is from before, when the template was a virtual match with source.

Monday, 10 October 2011

Master Breath

A few months ago before I stopped doing my regular rituals of connecting with the sun, earth, moon, etc., I suddenly started including a connection with what I called ‘Master Breath’. I have no idea why I was moved to do so but it felt right.

I’ve slowly became aware that the air around us is an entity. Besides the energy we draw in through our chakras, the life force that we draw into our lungs is of the utmost importance.

I have had a revelation lately that shed a little light on one of the many layered reasons that I am working at the sleep centre.

Breathing is an essential mechanism of the body. Without breathing we would die, as we are not able to draw in the prana needed by the body.

Most of the patients that I treat at the centre stop breathing in their sleep. I knew that there was some significance to this but hadn’t quite figured it out. Most of us breathe pretty shallowly at the best of times, especially when stressed. Deep breathing helps us to relax as the much needed prana makes its way around our body. Breathing deeply during exercising takes us out of our head and into our body, thereby stopping us from thinking too much.

I did an internet search and came across a site that gave this information which pretty much resonates with what I have been getting. Aeolus, the Cosmic Holy Spirit is the one who gives us our first breath and takes our last breath. He is the prana or Breath of God and was the Maha Chohan or Great Lord of all the chohans. He is now simply known as the Cosmic Holy Spirit. He is the Breath of Life.

 He is also known in Greek mythology as the ruler over the winds – the wind god and king of the floating island Aeolia. But this is by the by.

He is also Pallas Athena’s twin flame. I had suspected that he was Athena’s twin flame but never really paid much attention until I received my own confirmation last week.

Rising to the occasion

I must be a really difficult person to live with. I’m always pushing the envelope beyond what is normal and expecting everyone in my family to cope with it, especially hubby.

But despite this, he always rises to the occasion, after growling very loudly, frowning like a thundercloud and a few choice words. There have been a few occasions where he has stood his ground without flinching and then I know I’ve overdone it and back down.

Am I a domineering woman? Yes - I come from a long line of domineering women. Logic ruled my life.

I pretty much started out my adulthood very hard and cynical. I very quickly took over in my jobs and rose really fast from being a receptionist of a small firm to the PA of one of the top family lawyers in Cape Town and where I could demand my own salary and working hours.

Confrontation never fazed me and when I believed I was right, I was right. It’s a trait that I have inherited from my father. Along the way I ran a debt collection department. Hard isn’t a word I’d use here - bitch is probably a much better word. People would come in with their hard luck stories and I was not interested. It was either pay or jail. I then moved on to run a house repossession department. I never had to search for a job – they seemed to land in my lap without much effort. I was head-hunted on several occasions.

It wasn’t until I fell pregnant with my first child that I started to change and become softer – my feminine side waking up. With this waking up the changes were gradual until March this year when Athena and I connected. I can see now why I had to start my journey as a very masculine energy, which occasionally still takes over.

Hubby and I have learnt much over the years from each other.

Thank you, hubby for rising to the occasion once again with the ‘lost boys’. You are a very inspiring man and I love you. You don’t realise your own potential or beauty.

New Earth New Us: Bringing forth the Divine 12D Blueprint

This is an article written by Luminance River on Lightworkers. I hope you enjoy it as much as I did.

Thank you, Luminance River.


Lately, as I mentioned in my last blog, I have had a feeling that we are computers holding consciousness.

This is what I wrote:
"The body is a computer" and "We are way more than the body/computer." In fact when we think we are the physical, it causes suffering. The body-computer is the vehicle. It is what we express who we are through, it runs from the greater nonphysical REAL us. Somehow playing with this lights me up with knowing, and makes me feel freedom. Then I spoke with S. about her idea of us coming back from the future, a recent download that she had and explained to me. It is something like this: we think the movie (or our life) is going forward (and speeding up) but it is going backward to who we really are. It is like the future self is inhabiting this 3d form more and more with what it knows in the future, multidimensionally and all. The form is our vehicle, the body-computer. I don't know if I can explain it but zero point is coming soon. By that I mean the end of the Mayan Calendar, the end of time, meaning a dimension, the third, or an experience of linear process ie time.

Another way to see it as many are in the 3d Operating system at this time, and are mind based. And some are in the future, say 5000 A.D. self Operating system, fully multidimensional and heart based, most of the time, yet it clashes (within us and with one another too) with the remnants of the 3d one that is still there. The old operating system is like a virus that fears deletion. It clings onto being changed. It is from before our future selves came into the instrument, the human body.

I keep playing with the idea of the body as a computer, or today I see it as a vessel in which consciousness plays in and through. It finds all sorts of people, with their various operating systems and vessels that are set with different programs and The ONE that we are wants to experience through these beings.

Aura colours

Here is a link to a website giving a great deal of detail about aura colours and what they signify.


Home for lost boys

I seem to be running a house for lost boys.

Hubby and I went out yesterday for the day and when we arrived back one of our son’s friends was visiting. My son came upstairs to ask me something and mentioned that Terence (the friend – not his real name) had had an argument with his parents and had packed his bags and left home.

Saturday, 8 October 2011

The expanded me...today

I was given a mantra yesterday to chant regularly. I believe it will help open up more memories not only within the brain but within the body as each cell carries memories too which settle in the body that you incarnate into each lifetime. It is also meant to help with the two hemispheres growing together and a multitude of other things. What I have discovered is that it seems to help the body adjust far quicker to the changes – almost like a divine dispensation granted.

The World vs Wall Street

Dear friends,

Thousands of Americans have taken over Wall Street -- joining a global movement from Madrid to Jerusalem to take back democracy from corrupt interests. If millions of us stand with them, we'll boost their spirits and show the media and leaders that this is no fringe movement. Click below to sign the petition - every signature will be counted on a giant live counter in the middle of the Wall St. occupation:

Sign the petition!
Thousands of Americans have non-violently occupied Wall St -- an epicentre of global financial power and corruption. They are the latest ray of light in a new movement for social justice that is spreading like wildfire from Madrid to Jerusalem to 146 other cities and counting, but they need our help to succeed.

As working families pay the bill for a financial crisis caused by corrupt elites, the protesters are calling for real democracy, social justice and anti-corruption. But they are under severe pressure from authorities, and some media are dismissing them as fringe groups. If millions of us from across the world stand with them, we'll boost their resolve and show the media and leaders that the protests are part of a massive mainstream movement for change.

This year could be our century's 1968, but to succeed it must be a movement of all citizens, from every walk of life. Click to join the call for real democracy -- a giant live counter of every one of us who signs the petition will be erected in the centre of the occupation in New York, and live webcasted on the petition page:


The worldwide wave of protest is the latest chapter in this year's story of global people power. In Egypt, people took over Tahrir Square and toppled their dictator. In India, one man's fast brought millions onto the streets and the government to its knees -- winning real action to end corruption. For months, Greek citizens relentlessly protested unfair cuts to public spending. In Spain, thousands of "indignados" defied a ban on pre-election demonstrations and mounted a protest camp in Sol square to speak out against political corruption and the government's handling of the economic crisis. And this summer across Israel, people have built "tent cities" to protest against the rising costs of housing and for social justice.

These national threads are connected by a global narrative of determination to end the collusion of corrupt elites and politicians -- who have in many countries helped cause a damaging financial crisis and now want working families to pay the bill. The mass movement that is responding can not only ensure that the burden of recession doesn't fall on the most vulnerable, it can also help right the balance of power between democracy and corruption. Click to stand with the movement:


In every uprising, from Cairo to New York, the call for an accountable government that serves the people is clear, and our global community has backed that people power across the world wherever it has broken out. The time of politicians in the pocket of the corrupt few is ending, and in its place we are building real democracies, of, by, and for people.

With hope,
Emma, Maria Paz, Alice, Ricken, Morgan, Brianna, Shibayan and the rest of the Avaaz team


Demonstrations in Spain protest political parties and economic crisis (Washington Post)

Israel uprising: Beginning of an end (Press TV)

Greece protests austerity measures (Washington Post)

Occupy Wall St - online resources for the occupation

Occupy Wall St primer (Washington Post)

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Adiemus - Songs of Sanctuary

I do so love this song - one of my meditation songs. This dance so beautifully expresses the feminine...

Friday, 7 October 2011

The expanded me

I am feeling so expanded today. Wednesday night I had a very restless night and couldn’t sleep much (which I desperately needed as I’d worked the night before and hadn’t slept all day Wednesday). On Thursday I woke to an excruciating headache. I took a pain killer which is not something I would normally do but I had a long day ahead of me at work.

I had a strange interaction with a patient yesterday. Well, maybe not – them up there are trying to emphasise something.

Tuesday, 4 October 2011

Sacred union

There is also so much going on esoterically that I cannot keep up. Meh…

When we left Castries to visit our friend in Menton, I was feeling quite tired. I have come to know the difference between being tired enough to sleep and tired enough to meditate. One means that I can meditate for an hour and come out refreshed, the other means I need a good night’s sleep (although these days it can be short – 2 or 3 hours).

Anyway hubby put some music on – Andrea Bocelli – and I lowered the angle of my seat and proceeded to meditate.  I found myself in the company of Archangel Chamuel.

We were about to undergo a ritual ceremony. Everything lately that happens to me, happens to hubby as well and therefore I asked that someone be driving the car through hubby so that we did not have an accident.

I cannot remember too much in detail, but what I do remember was the beauty of the celebration had me in tears – but not tears of sadness – tears of happiness and joy. We were being given our service. I’d asked a while ago what our service to humanity was going to be, as I no longer transmute energy for the collective and am no longer an anchor of balance for love and pleasure in the 3D world.

Basically hubby and I will travel and anchor our energy, thereby creating rivers of energy all over the world so that whenever we have sacred union through lovemaking it will travel down these rivers and reinforce the energy of love and pleasure in 5D. There will be many sacred union couples doing similar or different aspects of this work, but they will all overlap creating a tapestry.

This was the main reason (beside visiting friends) that we needed to move along the Riviera of France. There is a very dense 3D energy of greed. I did not go into Monaco – we simply drove past it. We did stop at Cannes which was heavily intense and by the time I got to Menton I was feeling overwhelmed. The main reason is that I still have not acquired the ability to use the osmosis that Athena has been teaching me. I still find myself wanting to fall back into old patterns. Trial and error, eh?

My dear friend and I met at a fair where we both had a stall next to each other, approximately 7 years ago. She was advertising for her healing work and I was selling my own flower/gem essences. We got chatting and never looked back.

We both have recall of the same lifetime as Roman soldiers – me as one of her foot soldiers and she as the general. I have no idea when and it doesn’t really matter, as what is important is the emotions that came from that lifetime. I had great admiration for her as my leader and would have followed her into hell. I remember being devastated when she died. I couldn’t believe that such a powerful force was a mere mortal. It really disheartened me.

We did an exchange of healing and during mine I was approached by two grays. Their energy was very benevolent and they removed an implant in my left hip. 

While in Menton, hubby spent a great deal of time with my friend’s dad, who was out from Blackpool on holiday. Hubby was glowing with health and vitality and in such a good space. It made my heart lift and sing with happiness. As we were leaving her father started singing, ‘Wish me well as I wave you goodbye’ and dancing with a smile on his face. My friend said as we were walking to the car, that she’d never seen her father do that before, so he must have really enjoyed hubby’s company.

We arrived home in the UK to some very good news. A while ago when I was told we would be travelling a lot more, I stressed to them ‘up there’ that I would not do any of this unless they supplied the finances so it would not impact on us. We’d been discussing on our return trip whether or not to go to Australia to see our daughter. She’s made the decision to settle there. I really want to see her as I miss her quite a bit. Voila! Weren’t we surprised to find the finances are starting to fall into place for this ‘holiday’.

So, Australia, here we come next year, to anchor more of the energetic rivers for the sacred energy to flow down. There are one or two things to sort out first before we book tickets, but it is all more or less in place. WOW, they sure work in fast and mysterious ways – how much loving and pleasure did we create on holiday to draw this abundance to us? The mind boggles.

Finally, I would like to add that I am very honoured, humbled and blessed to be part of the anchoring of the sacred union energy.

Monday, 3 October 2011


I have been reading a book by Mark Boyle called The Moneyless Man (A year of freeconomic living) which I bought for hubby to read during our holiday.

Mark is a financier that one day decided he’d had enough of the financial world and wanted to try and live for one year without any money, which he has proved is very possible.

Sunday, 2 October 2011


Hehe…I did my first video blog yesterday. I was slightly worried and when I watched it, it seemed rather quiet and distracted for me. Although, don’t get me wrong, I am a quiet person, I am also loud at times. But maybe that’s what I am like all the time – don’t know – I’ve never watched myself before. Maybe I am a boring person after all.

A game within a game

This is the blog a friend wrote this morning which resonated within me. Thanks, Mati :)

The song really moved me - especially the sections sung by those all around Africa.

Africa - the continent that still holds my heart.

Wednesday, 28 September 2011

Oh poop

Oh poop, I’m wondering if I’ve shot myself in the foot…again.

A while ago I mentioned that I would be leaving the sleep unit once the salary re-banding of the technicians had become a reality. I made it an intention once I’d received guidance. Or did I make the intention without guidance. Not sure – it has simply been a knowing for years.

Contemplating my navel

I have been in a quietly contemplative mood since we arrived back in the UK in the early hours of Sunday morning.

I’m not sure why, but it feels like I need some time to integrate all the changes hubby and I experienced for those three weeks in France. And…everywhere I look there are adverts for flights to Australia…they’re making sure I don’t forget :) Okay, man, okay, I’m gonna do it – just leave me alone for a while to contemplate my navel without any interruptions.

Monday, 26 September 2011


As pioneers we have a duty of care to those awakening.

I know it can sometimes be a pain in the ass to have someone being negative or ranting back at you. I view it this way.

When in the past I’ve thrown a wobbly because my request has not been addressed or seems to be ignored – shouting at the angels, God and any ascended masters - do you think they turn away and say, ‘Stupid woman, let’s leave her to get on with it. I don’t need this in my world.’


Erk…back to ‘normal’.

I have just had my regular three year pap smear done up at the doctor’s surgery. I’ve always viewed them with a jaundiced eye. Every woman knows how awful it is to have a cold thing shoved inside them, then split open and someone scratching around taking a smear. Shudder.

Coming to an end

Saturday, 24 September 2011

And so our ‘just the two of us’ holiday is ending.

We have just left the farmhouse on our last night in France – this is the same place we spent our first night. It was very enjoyable, as we spent time with a French family, having dinner and breakfast with them finding out about the French lifestyle. Between our pidgeon French and their pidgeon English we had a great deal of fun using gestures and when words failed us, using other languages or speaking loudly and slowly (as though retarded) – why do we do that?

Saturday, 17 September 2011


I seem to be stateless once again in my life.

I was born in Zambia to British parents during the time of independence from Britain. The British government didn’t want me or my sister because we were born in the new independent state and the Zambian government didn’t want us because we weren’t Black, this despite my father working for the Treasury department.

Thursday, 15 September 2011


What a w-w-w-weird day. Actually no…not weird, simply very different.

Last night as the twilight turned to dark, our electricity disappeared. Hubby checked with the neighbouring chalets but all of them were okay and nothing had tripped on our board.

Tuesday, 13 September 2011


I’m not sure how much I’ve been told is true and I haven’t seen anything to confirm this.
I was contacted quite urgently telepathically by someone who channels the Hathors, because they wanted to make sure I didn’t connect to the old moon. It was imperative. I'd had a similar feeling lately. I asked my inner guide, Athena, and she confirmed that I was NOT to connect to the moon as I have been over the years. In fact I was told not to connect to anything or anyone except Mother Earth and 9D Athena. Wow, that is something new – connecting energetically through all my chakras to 9D Athena. Phwoar – energy zap.
Years ago I’d heard that the current moon had been manipulated into giving us a lunar cycle that would control us and specifically control the feminine. I shoved it to the back of my mind because I’d never heard anything more.

Monday, 12 September 2011


How do we define love of a couple for each other? Is it a glance, a feeling, a heart pounding, the quickie or the long walks in the evening discussing life?

The definition for me is a combination of many facets. There is no one thing that shouts love. To me it could be the disagreements, the shared moments of happiness, as well as the worry over what will happen next.

Saturday, 10 September 2011

Cleaning and clearing French style

Well, don’t I have egg on my face!!!

I thought I was the one with the steamy ideas, but didn’t count on hubby having a few up ‘his sleeve’ so to speak :)

Hot weather, hot man…what more could a woman ask for?

Sunday, 4 September 2011


Well, haven’t we had an eventful two days :)

Yesterday I went to see my beautician of many years – a young woman now in her late 20s - wonderful girl. She and I get on really well and for the first time I find myself loyal to someone because of this. I was determined to hang on to her for eternity. All her products are organic, which made me even more determined.

Me, an alien?

I took these photos a few weeks ago and downloaded them so I can have some different avatar pics in the stable, 'so to speak'. So I spent some time messing around with the camera and discovered how difficult it is to take your own picture :)

Saturday, 3 September 2011

Hehe...another funny

My mom sent me this... :) I can imagine her doing this.


Yesterday I was at my local COSTCO buying a large bag of Purina dog chow for my loyal pet, Jake, the Wonder Dog and was in the check-out line when a woman behind me asked if I had a dog.

What did she think I had an elephant? So since I'm retired and have little to do, on impulse I told her that no, I didn't have a dog, I was starting the Purina Diet again. I added that I probably shouldn't, because I ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms.

I told her that it was essentially a Perfect Diet and that the way that it works is, to load your pants pockets with Purina Nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry. The food is nutritionally complete so it works well and I was going to try it again. (I have to mention here that practically everyone in line was now enthralled with my story.)

Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care, because the dog food poisoned me. I told her no, I stepped off a curb to sniff a poodle's ass and a car hit me.

I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack he was Laughing so hard.

Costco won't let me shop there anymore.

Better watch what you ask retired people. They have all the time in the World to think of crazy things to say.

Rebirth of the Divine Masculine

This is a beautiful video uploaded by Soferia on LW. It really touched me.

It is very relevant to what I feel about hubby. I hear women speak of their partners in a very derogatory way and it saddens me that they have not actually had a look to see what the lesson is behind all the 'difficulties' they face within their partnership.

Friday, 2 September 2011

Woohoo - holiday

Woohoo…I’m officially on holiday. Hubby’s last day today and then we’re off to France on Sunday for some fun, sun, good food and wine and loads of lurving :)

For the first time in 21 years we are having a holiday without children, family or friends - just the two of us. We’re crossing by ferry from Dover to Calais early morning and stopping off at a wine farm for a night on our way down to the south coast.

Thursday, 1 September 2011


You know I have approached this whole telepathy experiment with trepidation, which descended into fear, then curiosity got the better of me, until finally I have now accepted that I can do this.

I think my biggest obstacle was the worry that this, in 3D eyes, ‘is not right’. Conditioning, eh?

But I do know that the Universe never gives you anything you cannot handle.

Wednesday, 31 August 2011

Funny haha

It has been a while since something has really fired up my intense curiosity and imagination.

I’d shut the door on trying any further connecting with this new person until I’d looked at it from all angles.

Today I opened the door and tried to find him, but found myself wading through quite a few bodies. Haha…I had a brief flash of someone and then another and another….

Tuesday, 30 August 2011


I am experiencing something that seems rather familiar but isn’t. I know it sounds odd.

When I was a kid I was aware of entities around me and could communicate with them. I sorta lost that as I got older, until I started on my spiritual journey and then the connection was there again.


Have you ever wondered what else shares our space with us?

We all know about the negative energies and for some of us, our demons are very real.

But what about the elementals?

Sunday, 28 August 2011

Influx of healing energy

Friday was a study in quiet solitude, a deep introspection that seemed to take me to a place I haven’t been to before.

On Friday afternoon I lay down for a sleep, as I was working Friday night. I woke to an amazing influx of healing energy. Thank you. It really perked me up. I am very grateful.

I had an amazing night at work, but today I am simply exhausted. Cannot get enough sleep.

Friday, 26 August 2011


Nothing…I feel nothing toward the world these days.

I have withdrawn so completely that I don’t even have any compassion and no desire to be part of it. This is very unusual for me as I’ve always been involved, initially, in the drama and then in the emotional transmutations for the collective.

Thursday, 25 August 2011


Overwhelmed is all I can think about today.

Everything seems to loom over me and is sending me into a state of anxiety.

There’s so much going on in my body, energy fields and mind. I am also feeling quite tearful again today which doesn’t help.

Even my job, that I’ve always felt confident about, seems to be giving me a bit of jip. We are on the brink of massive changes. I think I might be too comfortable in the old way. The idea of changing is not inspiring to me today. Strange isn’t it? I’ve been working toward this and yet now I’m having second thoughts.

I think I desperately need to get away. I’ve not had a holiday in a while. I’m probably winding down in all aspects of my life, from work to energy to ways of being and lifestyle. Clearing more clutter, which I thought was more or less done.

I am becoming a being of simplicity by removing the final bits of 3D that hang on relentlessly. Maybe this is a final shot from 3D at keeping me in place. Possibly bits of me are in on the act.

Memories are flooding in at such a fast rate I cannot cope. The thought of writing any more today makes me shudder.

Athena intimated that I am not only clearing the last of my 3D emotional memories, I am also revealing ones from the higher realms I had forgotten. Meditating on my love of horses will open these.
I’m not ready for it today…maybe tomorrow. Today I am going to wallow.

I am sitting here listening to Tears for Fears. Guess what has just come on?   Woman in Chains :)

Wednesday, 24 August 2011


Yesterday was quite a restless day. I decided I was going to write about my love of horses, but didn’t quite get around to it.

This morning I woke with a vision of myself at a young age riding a pony. It was like the cartoon depiction of Giles, with those fat little ponies and their scruffy riders.

The Gold Solar Planet (6th Dimension)

I thought I'd uploaded this a while ago but on checking through my blog I don't think I have.

This was sent to me by a friend a while ago.

Monday, 22 August 2011


My hubby sent me this joke. Thought it was very funny:

After being married for 40 years, I took a careful look at my wife one day and said ...... "Forty years ago we had a cheap house, a junk car, slept on a sofa bed and watched a 10-inch black and white TV, but I got to sleep every night with a hot 23-year-old girl.

Sunday, 21 August 2011

Spiritual loving

Over the years I’ve seen friends, who’ve been on the spiritual path, find that the partnerships they have been in are not conducive to their spiritual growth. They’ve separated and eventually entered a relationship with another who was more ‘spiritually in-volved’. These have ended in disaster, as what they thought was a beautiful partnership, descended into the same problems they experienced in their previous relationship.

Saturday, 20 August 2011

Lion energy

Whilst in the bath this morning soaking away the night duty, I did my usual grounding routines, flames, etc.

As I lay quietly without any thought, a pair of eyes slowly came into focus. All I could see were two amber eyes and a beige/brown broad nose. I pulled back a bit to get a better view and discovered it was a lion. Well, I thought it was a lioness at first but the further back I went, I realised he had a mane.

Friday, 19 August 2011

Balance, spiders and mice

I found myself slightly tetchy this morning when I woke. Don’t ya love that word ‘tetchy’?

It wasn’t my emotions, it was my body. Is there a difference? I wouldn’t have said so but…

I stared at the screen for a while before wandering downstairs trying to figure this out. On passing through the kitchen an orange grabbed my attention. So I peeled it and sat in the garden munching on it while thinking. It seemed to get the cogs going.

Thursday, 18 August 2011

A little sad

I was a little sad last night as I thought about my daughter so far away. I miss her. I realised that it is something I shove to one side rather than actually face it.

Last night I faced it. When I am tired I am far more vulnerable than usual. I suppose these last 6 years of night work has really given ‘them’ a chance to pierce any weak links in my armour, get in and nudge issues to the surface.


I sorta almost…almost unplugged in the early hours of this morning. Mainly because my work colleague fell ill. She tried not to disturb me during my ‘hour off’ but eventually knocked me awake to let me know that she had a tummy bug of some kind and what should she do.

Jeepers, how do you think quickly when pulled out of a deep sleep?

Tuesday, 16 August 2011

5D Mastery

Since my revelation yesterday about being in 5D permanently, I have been connecting with 5D Mother Earth. I cannot tell you how different this energy is and keeps me in a state of happiness and on an even keel.

I’ve done this because, as Sue mentioned, we have disconnected from the 3D matrix and have plugged into the 5D matrix. I’m not sure why I didn’t figure this out for myself?

A little more info

Athena has given me a little more information on this 5D thingie.

She asked me if I had noticed anything different lately. After a bit of prompting I finally twigged. When I walk anywhere lately people either walk into me as though I’m not there or when they do see me they smile as though they know me. So it’s either ignore me or embrace me. I’ve had this for a while so never quite really noted it as something different.