Portal opening

Ramblings about life . . .

What I share about my life is simply to help reinforce the understanding that it is possible to live with love and laughter, in between the tough times.

Life is what we make of it, no matter how harrowing. We accept and embody this with-in ourselves, thereby allowing the energy to manifest outwardly in our reality.

It starts with each one of us as an individual to form the collective consciousness.

Be the dream.

We honour the light and the life within you.

Please be aware - I upload other bloggers' posts and then delete after a month. This is my journey and others help me understand where I am, until they become irrelevant (a few posts excepted).

Monday, 31 October 2011

Well now, ain't that interesting

I have felt like I am in ‘holding’. I keep getting this word buzzing around in my head when I ask what is happening. For a few days I seemed to lose contact with all my helpers, until this morning. In reality I hadn’t lost contact with them – I was simply so engrossed in the new experience that I was focused on that.

Fond and not so fond memories

I recently did a search on Facebook to see if I could find out about my old high school in Windhoek, Namibia. I found a group started for all St Pauls College students – old and new and so I decided to join and have found a few old school ‘friends’.

Friday, 28 October 2011

Karma and fun

What a way to end the Ninth Wave of the Mayan calendar. I have to write an assignment on abuse. Erk. I’ve been putting it off but finally have to get my arse into gear as it needs to be in by this weekend. Maybe I was hoping the world would change over night and I wouldn’t have to J

So instead…I am writing a blog…hehe…any excuse, eh? Reminds me of school and college, always an excuse to do the least amount of work and have the most amount of fun  and boy...did I ever? J

Tuesday, 25 October 2011

What are dark entities?

I’m not keen on doing writing this but Athena has insisted. She says that lack of knowledge creates fear. If people are informed then the fear factor is taken away and people are empowered. As I have been doing transmutation and working to clear my own negative energies for years I figure I possibly have an insight into this and with Athena’s help we will clarify.

I am sure Ishtar and the other gatekeepers know most of this…

Monday, 24 October 2011


Well…what can I say…this has been a rather enlightening week for me.

Where to start?

I'd been skipping along on a high for a while after the angel activation/integration and then fell flat on my face. Sometimes it’s good to have this because it puts things into perspective, especially when you realise how far you’ve come – it’s a good bench mark.

Wednesday, 19 October 2011

Dark energy

I wrote an article about 8 years ago with regard to how our energy affects our children. I wrote it basically in response to a worried mother's query about her children's teeth on a forum that was an offshoot of the Lightworker.com (Steve Rother) website.

How you might wonder does that answer her question? Well, I had realised over the years that energetically I influence my children.

Monday, 17 October 2011

Disharmonic 4D

Hehe…ya think I’ve stirred up the energies?

Ever since I did my video blog Joy Joy and fire breath, I’ve attracted the attention of some strange guestbook entries on my website. Nothing awful – simply reams of random names.

Sunday, 16 October 2011

Detached observer

The detached observer is something I have practised over the years, but until recently never understood it…and, I do believe, didn’t really do the words ‘detached observer’ justice.

When we interact with others (no matter what dimension) we are interacting not only physically but on an energetic level and on many layers.

Saturday, 15 October 2011


Thursday, 13 October

What a beautiful and peaceful day I’ve had.  I was busy but it was a busy-ness that wasn’t overwhelming.

But…as I was walking to work I noticed that in amongst all this bliss was a smidgen of sadness.

Thursday, 13 October 2011

Pure JOY

Pure JOY. Complete and utter joy.
Last night I woke after another very deep sleep to find myself once again surrounded. This time Aeolus was in the forefront. Athena seems to have taken a back seat lately.
I still felt very floaty with the joy and love I’d experienced during the day and mentioned in my video blog Joy Joy and Fire Breath .
I did a fire breath or two and lay quietly waiting. 

Tuesday, 11 October 2011

Honoring Divine Masculine and the Divine 12D Blueprint from Source

Another really great read from Luminance River.


Source created the universe from three primordial sounds on the higher dimensions. This I hear as a story, and it resonates, like the sound OM as the beginning, which is a vibration and a frequency. From frequencies and vibrations worlds are created. 12D was created as a divine blueprint for life from source. I sense this is what Barbara Marciniak speaks of when she channels Pleaidians and mentions how important the living library is. It is the codes for the divine blueprint and we carry them in our DNA, and all life carries this blueprint, the original undistorted one. It is the crystal consciousness from BEFORE all the programming of culture was put onto humans. It is from before, when the template was a virtual match with source.

Monday, 10 October 2011

Master Breath

A few months ago before I stopped doing my regular rituals of connecting with the sun, earth, moon, etc., I suddenly started including a connection with what I called ‘Master Breath’. I have no idea why I was moved to do so but it felt right.

I’ve slowly became aware that the air around us is an entity. Besides the energy we draw in through our chakras, the life force that we draw into our lungs is of the utmost importance.

I have had a revelation lately that shed a little light on one of the many layered reasons that I am working at the sleep centre.

Breathing is an essential mechanism of the body. Without breathing we would die, as we are not able to draw in the prana needed by the body.

Most of the patients that I treat at the centre stop breathing in their sleep. I knew that there was some significance to this but hadn’t quite figured it out. Most of us breathe pretty shallowly at the best of times, especially when stressed. Deep breathing helps us to relax as the much needed prana makes its way around our body. Breathing deeply during exercising takes us out of our head and into our body, thereby stopping us from thinking too much.

I did an internet search and came across a site that gave this information which pretty much resonates with what I have been getting. Aeolus, the Cosmic Holy Spirit is the one who gives us our first breath and takes our last breath. He is the prana or Breath of God and was the Maha Chohan or Great Lord of all the chohans. He is now simply known as the Cosmic Holy Spirit. He is the Breath of Life.

 He is also known in Greek mythology as the ruler over the winds – the wind god and king of the floating island Aeolia. But this is by the by.

He is also Pallas Athena’s twin flame. I had suspected that he was Athena’s twin flame but never really paid much attention until I received my own confirmation last week.

Rising to the occasion

I must be a really difficult person to live with. I’m always pushing the envelope beyond what is normal and expecting everyone in my family to cope with it, especially hubby.

But despite this, he always rises to the occasion, after growling very loudly, frowning like a thundercloud and a few choice words. There have been a few occasions where he has stood his ground without flinching and then I know I’ve overdone it and back down.

Am I a domineering woman? Yes - I come from a long line of domineering women. Logic ruled my life.

I pretty much started out my adulthood very hard and cynical. I very quickly took over in my jobs and rose really fast from being a receptionist of a small firm to the PA of one of the top family lawyers in Cape Town and where I could demand my own salary and working hours.

Confrontation never fazed me and when I believed I was right, I was right. It’s a trait that I have inherited from my father. Along the way I ran a debt collection department. Hard isn’t a word I’d use here - bitch is probably a much better word. People would come in with their hard luck stories and I was not interested. It was either pay or jail. I then moved on to run a house repossession department. I never had to search for a job – they seemed to land in my lap without much effort. I was head-hunted on several occasions.

It wasn’t until I fell pregnant with my first child that I started to change and become softer – my feminine side waking up. With this waking up the changes were gradual until March this year when Athena and I connected. I can see now why I had to start my journey as a very masculine energy, which occasionally still takes over.

Hubby and I have learnt much over the years from each other.

Thank you, hubby for rising to the occasion once again with the ‘lost boys’. You are a very inspiring man and I love you. You don’t realise your own potential or beauty.

New Earth New Us: Bringing forth the Divine 12D Blueprint

This is an article written by Luminance River on Lightworkers. I hope you enjoy it as much as I did.

Thank you, Luminance River.


Lately, as I mentioned in my last blog, I have had a feeling that we are computers holding consciousness.

This is what I wrote:
"The body is a computer" and "We are way more than the body/computer." In fact when we think we are the physical, it causes suffering. The body-computer is the vehicle. It is what we express who we are through, it runs from the greater nonphysical REAL us. Somehow playing with this lights me up with knowing, and makes me feel freedom. Then I spoke with S. about her idea of us coming back from the future, a recent download that she had and explained to me. It is something like this: we think the movie (or our life) is going forward (and speeding up) but it is going backward to who we really are. It is like the future self is inhabiting this 3d form more and more with what it knows in the future, multidimensionally and all. The form is our vehicle, the body-computer. I don't know if I can explain it but zero point is coming soon. By that I mean the end of the Mayan Calendar, the end of time, meaning a dimension, the third, or an experience of linear process ie time.

Another way to see it as many are in the 3d Operating system at this time, and are mind based. And some are in the future, say 5000 A.D. self Operating system, fully multidimensional and heart based, most of the time, yet it clashes (within us and with one another too) with the remnants of the 3d one that is still there. The old operating system is like a virus that fears deletion. It clings onto being changed. It is from before our future selves came into the instrument, the human body.

I keep playing with the idea of the body as a computer, or today I see it as a vessel in which consciousness plays in and through. It finds all sorts of people, with their various operating systems and vessels that are set with different programs and The ONE that we are wants to experience through these beings.

Aura colours

Here is a link to a website giving a great deal of detail about aura colours and what they signify.


Home for lost boys

I seem to be running a house for lost boys.

Hubby and I went out yesterday for the day and when we arrived back one of our son’s friends was visiting. My son came upstairs to ask me something and mentioned that Terence (the friend – not his real name) had had an argument with his parents and had packed his bags and left home.

Saturday, 8 October 2011

The expanded me...today

I was given a mantra yesterday to chant regularly. I believe it will help open up more memories not only within the brain but within the body as each cell carries memories too which settle in the body that you incarnate into each lifetime. It is also meant to help with the two hemispheres growing together and a multitude of other things. What I have discovered is that it seems to help the body adjust far quicker to the changes – almost like a divine dispensation granted.

The World vs Wall Street

Dear friends,

Thousands of Americans have taken over Wall Street -- joining a global movement from Madrid to Jerusalem to take back democracy from corrupt interests. If millions of us stand with them, we'll boost their spirits and show the media and leaders that this is no fringe movement. Click below to sign the petition - every signature will be counted on a giant live counter in the middle of the Wall St. occupation:

Sign the petition!
Thousands of Americans have non-violently occupied Wall St -- an epicentre of global financial power and corruption. They are the latest ray of light in a new movement for social justice that is spreading like wildfire from Madrid to Jerusalem to 146 other cities and counting, but they need our help to succeed.

As working families pay the bill for a financial crisis caused by corrupt elites, the protesters are calling for real democracy, social justice and anti-corruption. But they are under severe pressure from authorities, and some media are dismissing them as fringe groups. If millions of us from across the world stand with them, we'll boost their resolve and show the media and leaders that the protests are part of a massive mainstream movement for change.

This year could be our century's 1968, but to succeed it must be a movement of all citizens, from every walk of life. Click to join the call for real democracy -- a giant live counter of every one of us who signs the petition will be erected in the centre of the occupation in New York, and live webcasted on the petition page:


The worldwide wave of protest is the latest chapter in this year's story of global people power. In Egypt, people took over Tahrir Square and toppled their dictator. In India, one man's fast brought millions onto the streets and the government to its knees -- winning real action to end corruption. For months, Greek citizens relentlessly protested unfair cuts to public spending. In Spain, thousands of "indignados" defied a ban on pre-election demonstrations and mounted a protest camp in Sol square to speak out against political corruption and the government's handling of the economic crisis. And this summer across Israel, people have built "tent cities" to protest against the rising costs of housing and for social justice.

These national threads are connected by a global narrative of determination to end the collusion of corrupt elites and politicians -- who have in many countries helped cause a damaging financial crisis and now want working families to pay the bill. The mass movement that is responding can not only ensure that the burden of recession doesn't fall on the most vulnerable, it can also help right the balance of power between democracy and corruption. Click to stand with the movement:


In every uprising, from Cairo to New York, the call for an accountable government that serves the people is clear, and our global community has backed that people power across the world wherever it has broken out. The time of politicians in the pocket of the corrupt few is ending, and in its place we are building real democracies, of, by, and for people.

With hope,
Emma, Maria Paz, Alice, Ricken, Morgan, Brianna, Shibayan and the rest of the Avaaz team


Demonstrations in Spain protest political parties and economic crisis (Washington Post)

Israel uprising: Beginning of an end (Press TV)

Greece protests austerity measures (Washington Post)

Occupy Wall St - online resources for the occupation

Occupy Wall St primer (Washington Post)

Support the Avaaz Community!
We're entirely funded by donations and receive no money from governments or corporations. Our dedicated team ensures even the smallest contributions go a long way.

Avaaz.org is a 9-million-person global campaign network
that works to ensure that the views and values of the world's people shape global decision-making. ("Avaaz" means "voice" or "song" in many languages.) Avaaz members live in every nation of the world; our team is spread across 13 countries on 4 continents and operates in 14 languages. Learn about some of Avaaz's biggest campaigns here, or follow us on Facebook or Twitter.

Adiemus - Songs of Sanctuary

I do so love this song - one of my meditation songs. This dance so beautifully expresses the feminine...

Friday, 7 October 2011

The expanded me

I am feeling so expanded today. Wednesday night I had a very restless night and couldn’t sleep much (which I desperately needed as I’d worked the night before and hadn’t slept all day Wednesday). On Thursday I woke to an excruciating headache. I took a pain killer which is not something I would normally do but I had a long day ahead of me at work.

I had a strange interaction with a patient yesterday. Well, maybe not – them up there are trying to emphasise something.

Tuesday, 4 October 2011

Sacred union

There is also so much going on esoterically that I cannot keep up. Meh…

When we left Castries to visit our friend in Menton, I was feeling quite tired. I have come to know the difference between being tired enough to sleep and tired enough to meditate. One means that I can meditate for an hour and come out refreshed, the other means I need a good night’s sleep (although these days it can be short – 2 or 3 hours).

Anyway hubby put some music on – Andrea Bocelli – and I lowered the angle of my seat and proceeded to meditate.  I found myself in the company of Archangel Chamuel.

We were about to undergo a ritual ceremony. Everything lately that happens to me, happens to hubby as well and therefore I asked that someone be driving the car through hubby so that we did not have an accident.

I cannot remember too much in detail, but what I do remember was the beauty of the celebration had me in tears – but not tears of sadness – tears of happiness and joy. We were being given our service. I’d asked a while ago what our service to humanity was going to be, as I no longer transmute energy for the collective and am no longer an anchor of balance for love and pleasure in the 3D world.

Basically hubby and I will travel and anchor our energy, thereby creating rivers of energy all over the world so that whenever we have sacred union through lovemaking it will travel down these rivers and reinforce the energy of love and pleasure in 5D. There will be many sacred union couples doing similar or different aspects of this work, but they will all overlap creating a tapestry.

This was the main reason (beside visiting friends) that we needed to move along the Riviera of France. There is a very dense 3D energy of greed. I did not go into Monaco – we simply drove past it. We did stop at Cannes which was heavily intense and by the time I got to Menton I was feeling overwhelmed. The main reason is that I still have not acquired the ability to use the osmosis that Athena has been teaching me. I still find myself wanting to fall back into old patterns. Trial and error, eh?

My dear friend and I met at a fair where we both had a stall next to each other, approximately 7 years ago. She was advertising for her healing work and I was selling my own flower/gem essences. We got chatting and never looked back.

We both have recall of the same lifetime as Roman soldiers – me as one of her foot soldiers and she as the general. I have no idea when and it doesn’t really matter, as what is important is the emotions that came from that lifetime. I had great admiration for her as my leader and would have followed her into hell. I remember being devastated when she died. I couldn’t believe that such a powerful force was a mere mortal. It really disheartened me.

We did an exchange of healing and during mine I was approached by two grays. Their energy was very benevolent and they removed an implant in my left hip. 

While in Menton, hubby spent a great deal of time with my friend’s dad, who was out from Blackpool on holiday. Hubby was glowing with health and vitality and in such a good space. It made my heart lift and sing with happiness. As we were leaving her father started singing, ‘Wish me well as I wave you goodbye’ and dancing with a smile on his face. My friend said as we were walking to the car, that she’d never seen her father do that before, so he must have really enjoyed hubby’s company.

We arrived home in the UK to some very good news. A while ago when I was told we would be travelling a lot more, I stressed to them ‘up there’ that I would not do any of this unless they supplied the finances so it would not impact on us. We’d been discussing on our return trip whether or not to go to Australia to see our daughter. She’s made the decision to settle there. I really want to see her as I miss her quite a bit. Voila! Weren’t we surprised to find the finances are starting to fall into place for this ‘holiday’.

So, Australia, here we come next year, to anchor more of the energetic rivers for the sacred energy to flow down. There are one or two things to sort out first before we book tickets, but it is all more or less in place. WOW, they sure work in fast and mysterious ways – how much loving and pleasure did we create on holiday to draw this abundance to us? The mind boggles.

Finally, I would like to add that I am very honoured, humbled and blessed to be part of the anchoring of the sacred union energy.

Monday, 3 October 2011


I have been reading a book by Mark Boyle called The Moneyless Man (A year of freeconomic living) which I bought for hubby to read during our holiday.

Mark is a financier that one day decided he’d had enough of the financial world and wanted to try and live for one year without any money, which he has proved is very possible.

Sunday, 2 October 2011


Hehe…I did my first video blog yesterday. I was slightly worried and when I watched it, it seemed rather quiet and distracted for me. Although, don’t get me wrong, I am a quiet person, I am also loud at times. But maybe that’s what I am like all the time – don’t know – I’ve never watched myself before. Maybe I am a boring person after all.

A game within a game

This is the blog a friend wrote this morning which resonated within me. Thanks, Mati :)

The song really moved me - especially the sections sung by those all around Africa.

Africa - the continent that still holds my heart.