Portal opening

Ramblings about life...

I am an Anchor of Balance for Love and Pleasure, Relationship Weaver and Lightbearer.

On the winter solstice 21.12.2011 the Portal to Love and Pleasure was activated through stargates on the physical body. These stargates (as well as the portals and wormholes) connect us to our multi-dimensional beingness.

Whatever I share about my life is simply to help reinforce the dream that it is possible to live in love. It starts with each one of us as an individual to form the collective consciousness. We embody this with-in ourselves, thereby allowing this beautiful energy to anchor and manifest with-in our World.

Invite the dream in, feel it...and through the feeling and dreaming, we create.

We honour the light and the life within you.

I am no longer writing on this blog. My new blog is Relationship Weaver and Lightbearer

Friday, 1 March 2013

Many thanks to you with a great deal of love



My time for blogging here is over. My life is flowing in a different direction. It has been a slow and gradual withdrawal for many months, until finally today, the time is right.

The blog as it is will remain. It is part of my journey - each post a stepping stone along the path that has led me to where I am these days.

My blessings and gratitude over the years to those who have visited, no matter how brief. Without you, this journey would never have been possible.

Thank you - from my heart to yours.

Namaste



Stillness and sight of the amazing potentials therein


I am in a place of stillness within. It is deep and all pervading, having no need for expression in the outer world...yet.

I've lost interest in many things that I used to enjoy...even writing. It is a transition time as the stillness shows me the potentials of what is within my grasp. My mind boggles, before making me smile with excitement and happiness at what I see.

Patience and acceptance are the key words I hear.

As the love I have for my work increases, I find myself astounded at the depths of this love. Never would I ever have dreamed that it is possible. Every so often the mind steps in and says something negative...but the higher heart merely smiles, accepts and loves it, totally unwaivering - and the balanced perspective returns.

The stillness of this loving peaceful silence is found within my relationship with hubby too. We fit more snuggly together so much more comfortably - both physically, mentally and emotionally - than we have ever been.

The world is changing because of ALL of us, even though it may not seem evident to many. Congratulations...we are doing a damn good job.

On 16 March we are leaving for our little place in the South of France. I love this area as it has an incredibly gentle and loving energy.

I have noted that there has been much about Mary Magdalene lately...most of which I've not read as I've not been drawn to it, but it did jog my memory about the folk lore that she is meant to have settled in that area of France. We are also close to the Cathar stronghold of Carcassone on the other side and therefore sandwiched between the two. Has there been an activation of some kind in these two places? I have decided to let my intuition and feelings guide me when I am there...rather than read and get a preconceived idea.

There has to be some significance as to why these three weeks of holiday (which through various synchronicities I've had to take before 1 April) is happening at the time of the Equinox again. It is mirroring the same time that we were in Australia last year - when the walk-in occurred.

I'm not going to analyse it or mull it over. It is as it is....which again is unusual for me because I tend to analyse everything.

At the moment I seem to have let go and am flowing with the energy, interested to see where it takes me.


Thursday, 28 February 2013

Washing up Bee Gees style

Hehe...

Last night hubby was singing to our 18 year old son about washing up to the Bee Gees - Staying Alive. It did eventually get a smile from him at his father's crazy dancing and singing.

'Well, you can tell by the way I wash up
that I'm a teenager, clean plates and
Warm soapy water are yuck


I've been trying to avoid washing up since I was born
But now it's all right, that's okay
I try to look the other way
I don't understand
The need for cleanliness by mom and dad

Whether you're a brother or whether you're a mother

I'm told ya gotta wash up, we've gotta wash up
Feel me balking and everybody's tuttin'
I'm a-stayin' alive, escaping washing up
Nag, nag, nag, washin' up, washin' up
Nag, nag, nag, washin' u-u-u-u-u-p'








Friday, 22 February 2013

What do you REALLY REALLY want?



 
What do you REALLY REALLY want?

This question has been plaguing me quite a bit these last six months. I don’t really know as I have so many options facing me.

Blimmin’ indecision…

When I look at each option I feel a flush of - ‘yeah that’s it!’ and then the doubts set in.

The problem is that each one seems so very far apart from each other. I think I might have written about this before. It is as though I am supposed to do ALL of it despite the seemingly vast difference. And yet are they?

Everything in our lives and past lives are coming together for this specific time when things are changing. Each life might have been incredibly different from another for a very good reason. It makes us 'all-rounders' with vast amounts of experience and understandings.

One of the roads I have been faced with is studying again. So far what we have had to do, in spite of slight trepidation, has been great. Being faced with a challenge has always got my blood pumping and this was no exception. I've been teetering on the brink of deciding whether I want to go ahead and put the cherry on top by studying for a two year degree.

*Sigh* I am not great at studying…hated it at school and at college. I managed to scrape through and yet when putting the studies into action…now there is the difference. I really get the hang of something with hands on experience rather than the dry old way of sitting at a desk learning theories. Even if the subject interests me, I find myself either starting to nod off or my mind wanders.

Thankfully what I will study will be a compromise between the two. Kinda like an apprenticeship. And because I work in the field I will be able to apply what I learn almost instantly, so it shouldn’t be quite as bad as I think.

This was my only reason for hesitating. I know I can do it…but do I really WANT it? Am I that excited about it?

Haha…last week as I was pondering this, hubby walked in and starting singing ‘What do you want? What do you REALLY REALLY want?’ Put me in mind of the Spice Girl’s song Wannabe. *Snort* and then to top it all that night I heard the song being played as a car drove past and then later on a quiz programme on TV!

Okay…I get it!

To answer the last question - yes I am excited - I love what I do…and yet the boring stuff…

I have decided it is up to me – my mind and emotions - to make it different and far more exciting than my perception currently is, cos at the moment I am still stuck in the ‘old’.

Hubby is very supportive and urging me to do it. Hehe…I suspect he is thinking about the money!

I finally came to grips with it when I realised that I am being presented with this opportunity because with the current energy influx, there will be dramatic advances in this field (and other fields of science)…and I will be at the forefront of this. Who can turn down a challenge like this? To take all my metaphysical knowledge and slowly apply it to the current medical model. This is what I do at the moment - although I don't do it blatantly or blab about it.

Sleep is such a relatively new field - very little is known about it and yet it fascinates many. So everything we do is research that helps us to understand.

Yeeks…yesterday I committed myself to this path because I was asked very bluntly – YES or NO.

Just gotta get my head (pun intended) around it.

Strangely enough over the last few weeks whilst monitoring patients at night, some of the video screens have captured sparkles of energy moving around the patients - almost like somebody had waved a magic wand. I’ve never seen this before.

My colleague said it’s probably just dust floating around… :-)

And you know what…
Why should I choose - that is old paradigm.

Why not have it ALL?



Monday, 18 February 2013

Friday, 15 February 2013

To hell and back...











We celebrated 26 years of marriage yesterday. I can’t quite get my head around that figure. It doesn’t mean anything to me…it is merely a number.
 
Rather when I think about all we have been through, it is then that it makes sense and I can relate.

Valentine’s Day - to us it is a Day of Love rather than the commercialisation seen. It is a yearly celebration of the day when we declared our love for each other as witnessed by others. 

I have no idea why we settled on this day as the day of the exchange of vows. The numerology of that date equates to a 5 (the party number and one of change - oh my, how much changing and partying we have been through and done), although at the time I did not know anything about all of this metaphysical stuff.

We've never gone out on the night because the commercialism does not sit well with us. We either go out before or after the day. We’ve done our best to make sure that this Day of Love permeates the whole year, rather than be focused on one day.

It also seemed strange to have so many celebrating on the same day. It may be argued that everyone is saluting love…but I disagree as it is a ‘celebration’ that puts many under pressure, creating stress and frustration as they try to be something they are not, express something they don’t feel for another or experience something they are unable to on that specific day.

We made an exception last night...and thoroughly enjoyed our night out. We were unperturbed by everything around us - had an amazing meal, good wine, fab company and excellent music.

Our marriage has not been one of bliss - I don't know of any that are. We have been to hell and back, again and again. Each time we came out stronger than before. In all honesty, there is no-one that can say that haven't been to hell and back...whether in a relationship or not. It was my choice to get to know myself through my relationship. I could have chosen to do it differently...

Like intrepid explorers, we battled our way through the leech infested jungle that sapped us of our energy, losing each other in the eerie spine-chilling mists of anger, hatred and dislike; plunged into the putrid stagnant waters of disgust, hair-raising fear and guilt; the sinking sands of worry, resentment, despair and blame; or scaled the steep cliffs of a large mountain of issues, at times dangling from an overhang, hoping that we would be fine. 

Reaching the edge of the jungle, stagnant waters, sinking sands and top of the mountain was an amazing feeling of ‘we’ve made it’…until the next time. It was great when we had these periods of brightness and happiness, feeling the sun on our skin, whilst swimming in the clearest of streams, laughing and enjoying each other…and loving to the best of our ability.

There are many memories that would, in the past, make me cringe. Looking back I can see how we bounced off each other, creating explosions throughout our marriage that reverberated for years stretching from the past into the future.

One thing I can say for sure is that it wasn’t, and still isn’t a stagnant or mundane relationship by any means. We grow daily, constantly exploring new frontiers.

Whether we are in a relationship or not - one of the questions being asked by me of me (and by you of you) throughout my life was, and still is, ‘How do you react?’ Initially I reacted in a negative way or ignored it in the hope that it would go away...but ultimately these states merely fed the situation. Until I got the message and understood that I was in charge of my emotions and therefore my reality, I kept having the same thing happen over and over again.

And yes of course, hubby has his own issues. That goes without saying. But my reaction to his reaction is all under my control...or rather - it should be. Like most people I have a ‘default’ setting. In other words, I react in a way that my inner tumultuous negative emotions dictate I should. Over the years I worked and processed at clearing those typical reactions until I reached a much calmer and peaceful state that filtered out into my world. Now I can choose whether to react or not, either way it is from a much better place.

I suppose I could have given up, thrown my hands in the air and walked away. But I didn’t. I always had this underlying faith and understanding that I needed to persevere. And persevere I did. My marriage has been a great teaching tool for which I am deeply grateful. It has helped me to become more of a master than I was. I’m not a complete master…yet. I still have a way to go.

But what holds true for me isn’t necessarily true for anyone else. It depends what our life path is. Our world is populated with so many diverse star nations. Some will go through multiple relationships, have none at all or stay in one that is stagnant. I don’t believe that there is anything that is right or wrong. Are we supposed to stay with one person or have many persons in our life? Is polygamy or monogamy the way to go? I have no idea…although the law might have something to say about polygamy :-).

We may look at others and believe that they have a better and luckier time than we do. Hmm…nothing could be further from the truth. Outwardly it may seem so…

I can safely say that today our marriage is filled with trust, love, happiness and forgiveness. These are emotions that come from within me. I trust, love and forgive myself for everything I have or haven’t done and this makes me happy. Well…mostly I am :-) – certainly more than I used to be.

Would I change anything? No, I would not. I have an amazing man in my life who still makes me weak at the knees...although there may be times when I will want to deck him with one punch-

Would I do it all over again? Never…unless of course for some reason I had to…

From this day forward may the love with-in spill out into our world with-out, building communities of love where everyone, without exception, has love in their life.

With a great deal of love from our heart to yours.