I’ve been pondering my new life that is being created. Totally immersing myself in it and feeling it.
A couple of weeks ago I woke and looked at the clock and it said 13:13. I must have gone back to sleep almost instantly and it was only the following day when I glanced at the clock and again it said 13:13. The memory of the night before popped up and I wondered how on earth I’d seen 13:13 in the middle of the night, as on the 24 hour clock 13:13 is daytime not nighttime.
I’ve not bothered to figure it out as I’ve not seen it again.
Thursday night I woke again to find myself chanting ‘Om namah shi’. My body was going crazy. I could feel every individual cell doing a dancing jig as though waking from a deep sleep. I’ve felt this before when I had something else happen…can’t remember what.
I chant it every so often since then and get the same reaction. So today I wrote it down and decided to do an internet search and this is what I found:
It means "I bow to Shiva." Shiva is the supreme reality, the inner Self. It is the name given to consciousness that dwells in all. Shiva is the name of your true identity- your self.
According to Hindu mythology there are three Gods who run this creation. The Brahma - who creates the universe, the Vishnu - who preserves the Universe and the Shiva - who in the end destroys the universe. Among the three deities, Shiva, though considered as destroyer, also symbolizes the inner self which remains intact even after everything ends.
In this mantra the chanter (one who repeats the mantra) bows to Shiva – his/her true self.
Om Namah Shivay is a very powerful mantra. It has been said that if this mantra vibrates continually in your heart, then you have no need to perform austerities, to meditate, or to practise yoga. To repeat this mantra you need no rituals or ceremonies, nor must you repeat it at an auspicious time or in a particular place.
This mantra is free of all restrictions. It can be repeated by anyone, young or old, rich or poor and no matter what state a person is in, it will purify him.
I don’t remember saying Shiva or Shivay merely shi almost like a shshshing sound that sounded a bit like ‘she’. According to some sites ‘shi’ is a shortened version of Shiva or Shivay.
This makes me think of the meditation with Lakshmi and Shiva. Maybe that’s when I had that strange jiggly feeling of the cells.
I suppose once I’d made the decision to focus on my new life rather than following with the current, it was time to help me find a way of moving ahead. I am destroying the old to make way for the new.
Another thing I’ve noticed is getting answers almost instantly or rather it seems to manifest before I’ve even thought it. I get something and wonder what that was about…only to have a thought pop into my head which answers it. Very odd feeling.
Makes me wonder if somewhere in all the mess that is my head, there is a very clear part of me thinking with absolute clarity. Dunno - I’m still wandering around in the fog that is my mind.
I’ve asked questions a few times and get an answer in my head that is clear and seems to create a resonance in my body. I asked this morning who it is and the answer is – it is all of me, everything past present and future including higher selves – all in one – each one come back home to roost in the presence that is me.
If I think about that – it makes sense as I feel far more than I did, say, a year ago.
Last night hubby and I were in the bathroom. I was teasing him about being too big to fit into the bath as his shoulders hang over the edge. He started mumbling something as he shifted around. Curious I watched him as he muttered and then asked if he was talking to me.
He frowned and said, ‘No I’m having a conversation with myself. It’s my personal psycho-therapy - only me, myself and I know about.’
Hehe… I can relate to that – I’m always having conversations with myself as I mull things over. I often wonder if I do it out aloud as I walk into town. I’ve often caught myself smiling at something…
This skit reminds me of my mind - needs a collaboration of all of my selves to make sense of things. Strangely enough (or maybe not) it was the top of my list on YouTube...hehe...you think they're trying to tell me something?