Portal opening

Ramblings about life . . .

What I share about my life is simply to help reinforce the understanding that it is possible to live with love and laughter, even with tough times.

Life is what we make of it, no matter how harrowing. We accept and embody this with-in ourselves, thereby allowing the energy to manifest outwardly in our reality.

It starts with each one of us as an individual to form the collective consciousness.

Be the dream.

We honour the light and the life within you.

Please be aware - I upload other bloggers' posts and then delete after a month. This is my journey and others help me understand where I am, until they become irrelevant (a few posts excepted).

Tuesday, 14 August 2012


There is nothing like a good bit of exercise to release anything held within the body…including emotions. Gets us out of our way so insights can come through.

After twisting myself into a pretzel yesterday (literally) and lifting a few weights with the help of my ever encouraging personal trainer, I found myself completely stripped of stress and drenched in sweat – more so than usual - and then in a state of tears again last night. One layer cleared away and another exposed!

I keep seeing 44 wherever I look. One website on numerology said this mean ‘NO! your guides are not happy with your decision’…huh? So I had a look at Doreen Virtue and she says ‘The angels are surrounding you now, reassuring you of their love and help. Don't worry because the angels' help is nearby’ which made me heave a sigh of relief. Thought I’d gone off on a wild goose chase!

One thing hubby and I noticed on Sunday when we spent time together is that our bodies are communicating with each other – I was always aware of this. The difference this time was that I could see the interaction that our bodies were making and it really astonished me. The body has its own innate intelligence and knows what to do – but obviously only when there is no interference from our emotions, thoughts, etc.

Of course we all know that the body does what it needs to do without us consciously instructing it in what to do - when we breath, blood circulates, hormone release, etc. But in our every day lives our brain has been in charge of our thoughts…and most specifically when it comes to sex…because sex is all in the brain - well, the 3D version is.

When our brains quiet down through meditation then we are in a state of presence and awareness and through this we are able to tap into the intelligence of the body. Depending where we are on our journey of clearing our emotions and thought forms, it can be a different experience for everyone. But for hubby and I on Sunday, it was a time of going with the flow of where our bodies wanted to be. And here BEing is the key word.

No thoughts or fantasies, simply BEing in the moment…and this is when hours can pass by and you don’t even notice. And so as we practice, we go deeper into this state of BEing. It is in this deep state of meditation that I could see our sexual areas talking to each other in ways I never expected to see. And what was so amazing was the depth of the healing that was going on between them. Traumas were being released.

The penis itself is an amazing healing tool if used correctly. It has the ability to heal in ways we’d never expect. In our 3D world of sex it has been used as a ramming tool and therefore the vagina tends to tense up and close down, so all the sensitivities that both of them would and should display are lost. 

As you know we tense up when on the verge of orgasm which takes us out of that deep blissful space. As both genitals tense up, this gets in the way of true full body orgasm, because we start DOing by being active. Instead, when there is a undulating wave of bliss passing through the body, we should simply relax into the wave and allow it to happen without movement (which is what the brain believes should happen). That way there is no tenseness to stop the whole body experiencing the bliss. So basically it means instead of doing 3D brain sex, we are doing 5D heart sex. As our hearts incorporate more of our chakras, this is becoming possible.

The further hubby and I delve into this kind of lovemaking the more astounded we become. It takes a lot of healing and clearing of old patterns to reach this stage.

When I asked for ‘help’ from above on where to go next, this was not what I expected to find. What a treasure trove we have denied ourselves.

Each time my twin entered hubby’s body last year for short periods of time…he made rapid changes and it was during these occasions that it came to into my knowledge the current form of lovemaking that we do. 

We’d done tantra in previous years, but it was the tantra that has you walking the edge of control rather than the gentle form that we are doing now that incorporates Karezza.

As the new entity gets to grips with hubby’s body, we are learning and understanding new things and one of them is about the passionate but gentler side of lovemaking. I was guided to buy the book Tantric Sex for Men: Making Love a Meditation…and have been reading it slowly over the last few days.

Last night I read a section which explained and helped us understand what had happened on Sunday.
If I’d read this before it would have become an intellectual attempt with the brain in charge to experience this. But because it was a spontaneous experience brought on by the two bodies, it was so much easier to understand, once I’d read the explanation.

Experience rather than intellectualising and theorising. BEing in the moment.

Our hearts have expanded to encompass the root and crown. Obviously there is a lot of clearing going on with the root which is our survival chakra in order to bring it into balance with the heart chakra. Hence all the clearing hubby and I are doing.

At the moment our hearts are looking a bit like a star (like the picture above)…in fact it suddenly struck me this morning that it looks like the Star of Bethlehem. Now the Star of Bethlehem flower is an essence that clears sadness and grief and this is something I have been feeling quite a bit over the last few weeks/month. Not sure if there is a connection but it seems so to me.

The central section of the star is the heart and the two sides (left and right) are encompassing the breasts. The middle piece goes up to encompass the crown and down to encompass the root. I do believe that it will continue to grow to incorporate all the other chakras, such as the earth star, etc. until we become a huge glowing heart star.

Hm…that sounds a bit like the pictures we see of angels.

There is a lot of significance in what I am seeing and understanding. It will unfold as we go along…but at the moment I seem to be clearing quite a bit of deep-seated grief.

Sheesh…a never ending symphony of emotions.

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