So here I sit wondering what next. I still feel a slight twinge from my right kidney every so often. They’re making sure I don’t forget about them. As if…
I want to thank everyone who replied to my blog about Darker Aspects of Myself and sent support, love and caring whether posted as a comment or a private message. I really appreciate it. A friend offered to send me distance healing for which I am grateful. She mentioned later that she’d had to go through a bevy of ‘doormen’ to get to me and it was quite intense. Haha…I know I’m well protected but didn’t realise how much. I suppose Athena has to make sure that I am, both physically and spiritually, otherwise all the time and effort spent on me is wasted if I expire before I should :)
I also finally understand why hubby is so fierce. He has to be the personification of the God of War as I have such an important job to do. I have no idea (well, I have an inkling) what it is, cos Athena is playing her cards close to her chest.
Hephestemon, my gatekeeper, is one scary dude. I know that whatever ‘nasties’ get through is for my own higher learning.
I’m the biggest Doubting Thomas ever. I still have trouble believing that Athena is my HS. I suppose the doubt keeps me humble and stops me getting big headed. I can also see how much she has guided me through my life, helping me to learn and understand and preparing me very well.
When I first started this journey the mentor that was sent to me was a wonderful clairvoyant clinical hypnotherapist in Cape Town. He is a man of great integrity and understanding. Through him for two years I developed my abilities. He taught me processing or transmutation until I was confident enough to do it on my own without him. Whenever I had a question he would never answer. He’d simply say that I had to figure it out for myself. He would answer other’s questions and so this left me feeling slightly miffed that he was ignoring me.
On a few occasions he started to say something then shut up. He would watch me speculatively with his ‘other sight’. It made me feel a bit like an experiment. He channels the Great White Brotherhood so I assume they were giving him info – I’ve never had the courage to ask him and of course I don’t live in Cape Town any more.
I finally moved on to find my own way and study through other teachers. My first spiritual teacher was Sananda, a kind and gentle energy. After him came Drunvalo Melchizedek and Thoth, both hard taskmasters here on earth and in the etheric. During all this time I was processing and transmuting on my own and getting used to doing it regularly. I would disappear for a few hours leaving hubby to deal with the kids and the house. Hubby never once complained. Sometimes I’d be gone for a weekend. One occasion we moved home and I wasn’t there as hubby picked up the slack together with my mum and dad and moved the whole house by themselves, kids in tow. I have been blessed with a wonderful family and husband.
The list of physical and non-physical mentors goes on. Working constantly on myself and learning alchemy in the best way. Turning base metal into gold or turning the baser part of myself into light. St Germain…what can I say about him except that he always made me laugh at myself, which in itself is a valuable lesson.
I’ve just read this over and I have no idea why I’m writing this. I suppose there’s a reason. One thing I did learn on this journey is how much the ego\body will throw obstacles in the way to stop you from releasing. They are both comfortable with what they do know and the idea of actually reliving a trauma sends the body into fits. It has taken the body a while to realise that it’s only an emotion and not the ‘real thing’ that it is reliving and therefore the emotion cannot harm it.
There were times when an emotion needed to be cleared and the body and ego brought out the big guns in the form of colds, flu, gastro and any other illness you could think of to stop me. My first mentor told me to be aware of this and this advice certainly stood me in good stead.
I have much to be grateful for both to my teachers and most especially to my body and ego. Both served a purpose and did it well. Through their stubborn refusal I have learnt much. Thank you body for gracefully transmuting even when you felt it was difficult. Thank you ego for helping me through this physical world.
It is now time for all to be balanced. Ego is needed for certain parts of the journey but doesn’t need to be in charge any more. Body is far lighter in vibration and therefore able to take far more higher vibration energies to anchor on Earth. Oh, I must add that Mother Earth supported me without question during this whole journey and she still does.
But you know, I am quite sure that all these entities are supporting everyone – not just me. We are all important but sometimes cannot see it with all the emotions in the way.
Athena is agreeing with me here. She is encouraging everyone to face their demons and integrate them thereby allowing you to move forward as a balanced person. She acknowledges that it is difficult for most to face their emotions but if you ask for help from your heart centre you will receive the support you need and you don’t need a physical guru or teacher to do it. She also advises that if some of you are hesitant please call on her and she will stand guard and guide you. Always ask that you be placed in a safe space so that as you process and transmute nothing harms you or those around you.
It simply boils down to being with and loving those parts of yourself you don’t like and through the loving you will integrate and become more balanced.
I wish you all well in your journeys. Anyone needing advice please ask.
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