Portal opening

Ramblings about life . . .

What I share about my life is simply to help reinforce the understanding that it is possible to live with love and laughter, in between the tough times.

Life is what we make of it, no matter how harrowing. We accept and embody this with-in ourselves, thereby allowing the energy to manifest outwardly in our reality.

It starts with each one of us as an individual to form the collective consciousness.

Be the dream.

We honour the light and the life within you.

Please be aware - I upload other bloggers' posts and then delete after a month. This is my journey and others help me understand where I am, until they become irrelevant (a few posts excepted).

Friday, 27 January 2017

Health and healing

I have been reading three books at once.

Lol...this reminds me of my first days on this journey, devouring as much reading matter as possible to fill up that insatiable desire to understand.

The first book I received as a gift at Christmas called Show Me the Money, Honey by Ian Wishart.The second was something I came across randomly called The Divided Mind by Dr John Sarno and the third is Molecules of Emotion: Why You Feel The Way You Feel by Dr Candace Pert.

The first book is about how big pharma has implanted into our belief systems that all we need are drugs to "heal" ourselves, the second about change of direction in the 1950s from understanding how our emotions/beliefs cause health issues to a drug dependant world and the third is about how the emotions can cause health problems.

I've known all about the info contained in all three, but it has been great to get snippets of stuff that I didn't know. There is always a reason we need to go back to something.

It's been a theme for me working in the medical field. Watching the patients coming in and out the Sleep Lab here in NZ and in the Sleep Centre in the UK. I enjoy my job because I am not dishing out drugs to take away a problem. About 90% of them have long lists of medication.

Don't get me wrong. There are times when drugs/surgery are necessary. I am not and never have thrown the "baby out with the bathwater". But drugs should be used to help someone on their journey to healing, not as a be all and end all solution.

The way I see my work - I am giving someone a machine that purely holds the throat open so the patient can breathe properly, thus giving their body/mind a chance to do the deep healing it needs when they sleep, thus creating an opening for change.

We all know how important breathing is in every way. It is part of the prana/life force.

My other job on another level is to shine a strong light of loving energy, which the person can choose to use...or not. On a cellular level it will be recognised, although the patient themselves may not be aware of it. It is a choice to allow the energy in...or not.

The mind/body connection question has been asked so often - it is a recurring theme for many as they struggle to understand how this is possible. We've all be brought up with the idea that our bodies are faulty, and that there is no possibility of healing unless you take a little pill and even then, we know it only patches the problem. The brainwashing continues to tell us that this is the best we can achieve.

NO, it is not.

I can say this with conviction, because I am my own proof.

Everything within us is dictating our reality in every way.

My first venture into this world put me on a fast track to learning and understanding. My mentor did not hold any punches. He proved to me over and over again that all the issues I was facing health-wise was caused by my beliefs. All I can say is that I am grateful that I was open to this and had the courage to continue rather than turn away when my deep beliefs were challenged. I wouldn't be where I am today.

Every time I enrolled to attend a weekend workshop in which we'd process those deep held beliefs and emotions, I'd get ill, with either a fever, migraine or vomiting/diarrhoea. My mentor used to push me to be there, saying it was simply my body's defence mechanism. It was a way of keeping me somewhere that was known, as the unknown is incredibly scary. Once I'd arrived at the retreat, my body would stop with the perceived illnesses.

I got to know my body very well and the type of stuff it would pull out of its little bag of tricks to stop me making the changes I knew I needed to make.

One of my patients overnight this week, was a woman who'd been an extremely overweight 150 kgs. She'd been on a CPAP machine for years. She lost half her body weight, had cosmetic surgery to address the excess skin and still continued on the CPAP machine. Oh my, she was stunningly beautiful both within and without. And yet I could see that she still doubted this.

The other part of my job, is to shine the energy of loving acceptance. Loving accceptance is the key. I don't shove my theories and ideas down people's throats, I don't form an opinion and I certainly don't judge. I simply accept - and let them talk while I listen. This acceptance is mirrored by the person. Sometimes there is a reaction of defence, but mostly they move into a different space.

The epiphanies they have, are their own.

I know I keep harping on about acceptance, but it is very important. If, as a lightworker, we don't enter this space ourselves, away from judgement, intolerance and prejudice, how on earth can anyone else do so?

So to carry on with the story - this lady had started feeling worse, complaining that despite having lost the weight her obstructive sleep apnoea was worse.

I am not sure why she never came back to us, but maybe she needed to go on this journey first before arriving back at our sleep lab.

She'd approached another sleep lab privately who tested her overnight on an automatic PAP machine. She was having worse OSA according to them. So she privately bought an automatic machine because she was convinced it would make things "better". It didn't - she got worse.

She then had oximetry done (monitors oxygen and heart rate). Her oxygen went down to the 70s (percentage-wise) and her heart rate would increase and she'd wake gasping and panicked. She was convinced there was something going on...and she was right, there was.

Her GP contacted a whole lot of sleep labs and finally chose us as the one who'd monitor her overnight to find out what was going on - not quite sure why this had never been considered before as all our work, the machines/masks we hand out and any follow ups/parts are on the national health service and therefore free. But again, maybe this was a journey she had to go on.

We requested that she not use her machine for three nights prior to her sleep study, so that the effects of using the machine would have worn off by then and we'd get a true reading.

Her sleeping pattern and breathing were perfect and very normal. No sleep apnoea in sight.

Using a PAP machine if you don't have sleep apnoea can induce it. I know from first hand experience. As a sleep physiologist all of us had to take a machine home and use it for a week so we could know and understand what our patients experience. I tried for three nights, but kept waking gasping. Using a PAP machine was inducing central sleep apnoea. I have seen this occur with a few patients. Where they were mistakenly put on CPAP, which made it worse then onto APAP and then tried on BiPAP as this had caused severe central sleep apnoea.

As a sleep physiologist we have to be very careful what we do.

In the morning, the patient was disappointed that she'd not had an "episode" of gasping. I disagreed with her (in a nice way of course :-) ).

We had a long discussion about what could be causing it. As she talked, I'd throw in an observation or two. I could see her mind working and her body reacting. Unfortunately her mindset was still in that mode of "I am ill". I could see her doubting me at every turn. It was difficult for her to perceive that her goal had been reached.

Finally, I mentioned that she should be proud of herself. She'd achieved so much with the weight loss and now she was being rewarded with perfectly good sleep.

Anyways long story short, she had an epiphany. She was so ready for it, otherwise it would never have happened. When I went back later after she'd dressed and had her breakfast, she was all teary eyed. She thanked me (and all sleep physiologists), appreciative of the good work that we do.

I could see that she understood the achievement she'd made. Her body had been giving her a message which she misunderstood. All she needed was someone to point her in the right direction.

She will probably continue to have doubts. That is normal. We all do.

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