Portal opening

Ramblings about life . . .

What I share about my life is simply to help reinforce the understanding that it is possible to live with love and laughter, in between the tough times.

Life is what we make of it, no matter how harrowing. We accept and embody this with-in ourselves, thereby allowing the energy to manifest outwardly in our reality.

It starts with each one of us as an individual to form the collective consciousness.

Be the dream.

We honour the light and the life within you.

Please be aware - I upload other bloggers' posts and then delete after a month. This is my journey and others help me understand where I am, until they become irrelevant (a few posts excepted).

Thursday, 14 August 2014

To infection or not to infection


It all started with Yoga Nidra on Thursday last week.

She asked us, as usual, to come up with a mantra that we’d repeat three times during the course of the Nidra. Of course I was prepared - I'm always prepared - but in the throes of the Nidra, a different one popped into my mind.

I am a mentor.”

Eh? Where did that come from?

If I’d actually had a chance to make the decision, I’d never have gone with that. So, I tried to change it but it kept popping into my head, even while I was chanting another one.

Talk about persistent.

My body responded with a little resistance. I didn't go into my usual deeply lucid state. I kept wanting to move bringing me out of the relaxed state - which indicated to me that I'd rather not release the resistance.

Anyways, I didn’t think much of it for the rest of the day.

That evening as I took a perambulation (don’t you love that word) around the neighbourhood, was when I'd noticed that my kidney on the right hand side was hurting. I dismissed it - as I do. But again the persistence - that night was uncomfortable and difficult to sleep.

The following morning I had a whole day of clinical trials to get through from 8 – 5. I felt off throughout the whole day, but you just get on with it, don’t you? I was very careful about what I drank and ate that day hoping it would help. Frankly, Friday night was horrifically painful not only in the kidney but in the head too.

Saturday morning I decided I was going to do a bit of a fast to give my kidneys a rest. I was restless and so in order to take my mind off what was going on, so we decided to go to Hever Castle. Nothing like a bit of nature to feed the body mind and soul together with activity. This way I not only support my body, but I take my mind off what was going on, thereby allowing it to release without stress.

Yeah well, fasting did I say? Processing emotions takes a lot of energy - so by the time 12.30 came, I was feeling much better and starving to boot, so we stopped for a bite to eat.
The laughter and fun at the jousting certainly boosted me even more and I slept very well Saturday night. By Sunday all was much much better.

So, all this points to my resistance to being a mentor. The only way my soul could get me to actually release this resistance was to take me by surprise. I know I can be a stubborn so-and-so...but mentoring? Really? Didn't know it was important! Although I suppose if I'd taken the time to listen to what was going on, I'd have known. What can I say - I get lazy :-)

Years ago, I discovered that it was up to me whether an illness manifests or not. The choice is always mine. But sometimes I don't wanna make the choice and sink into accepting the illness, before realising what I am doing and changing it. It teaches us mastery at the same time...or not.

Feeling those words during the Nidra, nudged that resistance within me to release and in the releasing there is a chemical reaction within the body. It is these toxins which need to come out somehow. We can have what is called a healing crisis. Mine manifested in my poor kidney. Of significance was that it was only in my right kidney which denotes the logical, masculine side.

Besides being careful about what I eat/drink I also need to support it in other ways – the only way I know how, is to get do something that makes me happy. This changes the energy around whatever is going on.

I do feel different today. As usual I cannot pinpoint what it is that has changed.

Why the mentoring? I have no idea. It remains to be seen how the reality of the world around me changes to accommodate whatever is coming my way.

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