Under the microscope - Part 1

Now that hubby has firmly stepped into and is fully present in his masculine essence, I find myself on the back foot all the time. I'm not sure that I particularly like not being in charge. And yet ultimately this gives me the chance to be fully present and step into my feminine essence.

Relinquish control? Eh? Not on your nellie!

To hell and back...

We celebrated 26 years of marriage yesterday. I can’t quite get my head around that figure. It doesn’t mean anything to me…it is merely a number.

 

Rather when I think about all we have been through, it is then that it makes sense and I can relate.

Valentine’s Day - to us it is a Day of Love rather than the commercialisation seen. It is a yearly celebration of the day when we declared our love for each other as witnessed by others. 

I have no idea why we settled on this day as the day of the exchange of vows. The numerology of that date equates to a 5 (the party number and one of change - oh my, how much changing and partying we have been through and done), although at the time I did not know anything about all of this metaphysical stuff.

I am not worthy

I am not worthy…I am not of value…these thoughts were running around in my head last night. I still have some of them today.

Yikes…where did that come from?

Suddenly an overwhelming sense of being valueless hit me...has been following me…and some still does.

I don’t deserve anything in my life…the wonderful relationship I have with my hubby, the time that Vicky is devoting to teaching me, anyone who is a friend, the comfort that I experience, the love of all those in my life, the job that I have, my beautiful kitties…etc…the list went on and on.